The Perpetual Struggle

This was the title of my first "personal" blog. Ended up getting extremely vocal, bulldozing its way through whoever, bashing, arrogance, criticising, analysing, truth speak..well - lets just say there was too much truth, for some, flowing on the bog. SO i closed it, cancelled the blog, and refrained from blogging for a bit. I had stepped on a few toes and had now given up my "never say die" attitude - caring too much for the thought of others. I was a hypocrite there..trying to please everyone, taking criticism to heart. Now i realize one thing, that I've always known but had suppressed - why go out of your way to please those who, well, wont do the same for you. Why care if they think your "dress sense" is not cool enough, your girl is not pretty enough, you don't go out enough, you're too fat, you're too small, you're a drunk, your boy is not good enough, you need a car, your car is not good enough, now you're just showing off, you think you know too much, you're TOO QUIET..well the list is endless of the constant criticism we all receive day in day out. So why bother, if after you've done all you can to please em, they still find something else to criticise you for. Why accept things that aren't comfortable with you, when by accepting that you are doing nothing but being a phony, a fake, a hypocrite and attracting more criticism towards yourself.

You can please some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time.

The realisation, or rebirth of this notion has sparked something within me that yearns more and more to be an individual..to be different. I have tried all this time to be different, but there has been times when i have bothered to conform just to make a few people happy/comfortable. But with new friends, old friend resurfacing, new books read..I can safely say i have people who care for me and love and appreciate me for the way i am..and especially for the way I am. I can stand on a pedestal, look uncool to the conforming public, but I know there is people who got my back..and I got theirs as well. Like Lupe said..we're LASERS! Who defined cool? Some will die chasing "The Cool" that is redefined with a new Soulja Boy track, Movado lyrics, JayZ's definition, or G-Unit clothing label. And what does life do-it goes on. How about redefining "the Cool" your own way, accepting that, and then focusing on much more important issues in life like the label on my shirt, or type of shoes i got (yes i know i love Adidas - solely cuz it ain't as cool as NIKE and em, and their "impossible is nothing" slogan lol).

So yes, the struggle does continue. In everyday life there is a perpetual struggle - for acceptance, to be different, change, love, peace...whatever it is you may be focused on and whatever it is you may find important, there is a struggle for that..even if it may seem to be laid on a silver platter (like how hard can it be to be uncool...ummm...REALLY hard trust me). There is struggle against the moral decay of society. The lack of respect to others solely for the fast they're human and they give you their respect. There is the struggle to always be right in whatever situation - look the bigger person.

What comes with the struggle is truth. No matter how many lies can be around..the truth always comes out..and in the end you do know who loves you and who does not. Winning the struggle comes in accepting mistakes and showing love and appreciation to those who respect, appreciate and love us. Realising that one conversation, no matter what the circumstances or distance - could be an eye opener, you could be inspired..and you could meet people who bound to stay and make a difference, or who are there to make a difference and disappear, closed doors could be reopened...a lot of change. it is all for a reason, and we should be thankful. Life gives for a reason and takes for a reason. Appreciate what you have, don't complain too much cuz the struggle will never stop.

So my past blog, The Perpetual Struggle, has been removed from the databases and can never resurface, but i have a new platform to speak my mind. I have found re-discovered my reason, my goals, who I wanna be, and who I want around me. And for that, I have people to thank. I reach out to you and hope you hear me, understand me, and understand the love and respect that has grown. So thank you for the difference you've made, and I hope you're here to stay.

tj

The Law of the little shovel

Came across this post on Seth Godin's Blog.
The concept : If you want to dig a big hole, you need to stay in one place.

If you walk around town with a little shovel, you'll just end up digging thousands of little holes, not one big one.

Call on one person ten times and you might make the sale. Call on ten people once each and you will likely get ten rejections.

The important thing to remember is that separate events are often separate. If you use the same ineffective approach on one thousand people, it's not going to start working better just because you use it more often.

Connected events, on the other hand, often benefit from frequency and trust.

Which leads to two viable strategies:
1. If you can stay still, stay still. Earn the trust, earn the sale by repeatedly demonstrating value and authority.

2. If you can't stay still, get a bigger shovel. Your marketing and your sales pitch has to be so refined and focused that it works the first time, because you don't get a second time.


Something to think about. Its all about taking life's lessons and learning from mistakes, perfecting the art, not running and hoping to get lucky.

tj

Sunday Jazz - Terri Shaltiel


So last night, Sunday, I went to my first live jazz show since I been here. Hadn't found any places, probably cuz maybe i was focused on other things and not really looking for a good chill place. Terri Shaltiel and Jon Taylor were playing.
I must admit, the lady is talented. The venue was probably the worst "club", "lounge", or whatever you can call it i have ever been to - EVER - but the music was beautiful. And the people there - simple people, wasn't too full, so met everybody, and what was inspiring was how people with very little treasure their moments and can give you such a beautiful evening. No fancy dress to impress themes were up - the musicians were talking to the public, the promoter was some lady who owns the Inn, and the mood in the place was just too good. Makes one realise how grateful we should be for the things we have. There are some out there who have less, but are embracing that, loving life, doing something about it instead of mourning about how unfortunate they are - impossible is nothing. She (Terri) performed with Amy Winehouse before - the humility in the voice as she spoke - no trying to be the "superstar" - but once the drums started going, the keyboard flowing, the base guitar, and Jon Taylor on the sax...there was no doubting how much of a superstar she could be. The lady is blessed, and yes, the lady can sing.

I may have doubts about going back to that place (unless Terri is back of course), but it was a lesson learnt. Love life, love those who love you, and be appreciative. Do not take anything for granted - and whatever you may be going through - someone else is going through worse.

tj

Everything happens for a reason



Everyday experiences open our eyes to new realities, and sometimes its a reality we dont wanna face. It aint always easy accepting the situation as it is. The secret lies in thinking about
tomorrow. So many of us, most if not all, have embrace the pain brought by life's disappointments, and have wasted valid time crying over spilt milk and failing to realise the situation as a lesson. One of my favourite tracks is a song by Joe Budden..no it's not pump it up, lol, called "For a reason"...
to quote the master

"...if I never got stabbed, wouldn't remember Veronica's wrath
Standing in the shower looking at the scab
I wouldn't know the hints of a stick-up kid
If I ain't have that short stint as a stick-up kid
If dude never tried to kill me, I mighta went numb
To all the bullshit that goes on where I'm from
And if I never went to jail, wouldn't needed a bail
Woulda probly went on to graduate from Yale
Woulda been a prosecutor standing in the court of law
But then that goes against everything he stands for
And if I never met Glo, how would I really know
All the shit that comes with, when you dealing with a ho
See it is what it is to be
Or it is what it is, at least that's what it is to me
And so if I could ever go back in history
I wouldn't change shit, I'd leave it all just to be..."
(OR lEAVE IT ALL TO KARMA ha ha ha)


Its life's situations that teach us, and as long as we take everything as a lesson, and with a deeper meaning like it has, then we can have a life with less stress and more appreciation of the things we have. I especially love the line "If I never met Glo, how would I really know, All the shit that comes with when you dealing with a whore"...Situations arise and events happen, that teach you..Become a better judge of character, be able to read the sings, when Cumulonimbus clouds are up, chances are it will rain - if you never been rained on after a bout of cumulonimbus clouds, then you never know, but once you get rained on, you know. So next time you see cumulonimbus clouds (meet another Glo), you run and realise its about to rain..instead of catching an umbrella, the wind might blow that away...


So no matter what you happens today, tomorrow i s a brighter day. You are wiser, you have been exposed to new situations and new circumstances and the reason behind the mishap is coming, it's all about patience, acceptance and appreciation. Its alright to shed a tear (well, maybe not for me tho lol), but long as you realise that tomorrow is a brighter day cuz of today's mishaps.

tj

Morphing Michael Jackson

Seeing as Michael Jackson is the hot topic right now, during my daily blogging routines I came across this video posted on some blog. Something to think about huh. Look at the transition..


So yea, what you think..Scarry huh..

tj

One day at a time


Okay..so originally this post is supposed to be about people who touched my life (thanx Shan - another one of those who have :-) )..but i then decided some people wouldnt want to be mentioned on the www (am one of those paranoid about stalk mentality (omg this brings back memories lol) and i got a blog..how bwt them that dont lol )..So i'm just taking it "one day at a time"..


Everyone goes through changes. And do you realize how much the present contradicts with "our plans" and the things we hope to achieve, the achievements, the bubblegum stuff (fake things like cars, clothes and all), the relationships, friendships, family.

I must admit, i been one like that myself..though my biggest flaw has been believing in people too much (dunno if imma change that tho cuz i hate prejudice more than anything so i kinda give everyone chance to prove themselves like i want to be given a chance to prove myself instead of just being labelled "typica dude"). It takes just one moment - couple words, blog idea, an inspired encounter, a confrontation, a whatever moment (sometimes you juss gotta lift your head up and say "f*** it"),..so many thing..to bring the realisation that life is too short and we should take it as it comes and do what we have to with what is presented.

you meet fake people, you meet real people, friends and fam got your back, friends and fam stab you in the back(victim - damn!), you get fired, you get anew job, dump or get dumped, get into a new relationship, fall pregnant - all these are situations that give you an option - A fresh start and a new presentation of who you are and seeing as "everything happens for a reason"..have you learnt from the reason behind the "happening"..or are you still focused on the grand plan you have had for the past few and been tweaking everything to fit into the plan just to make sure it works..

take it one day at a time. Be focused on what you want, but not so narrow minded as to forget that each moment deserves its moment to pass and be acknowledged, else it'll be something you'll regret forever.
One day at a time, hoping tomorrow brings a brighter moment..

got the smile on still :-)

tj